


A Question of Judgement

by LtLime23



Series: Beyond the Archon [2]
Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Betrayal, F/F, Gen, Mild Language, Poor Life Choices, Revenge, Torture, brief romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-04
Updated: 2017-05-04
Packaged: 2018-10-28 03:12:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10822545
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LtLime23/pseuds/LtLime23
Summary: Liam Kosta was always trying to do the right thing, but with resentment and jealousy brewing could he trust his judgement and what would the consequences be if he got it wrong?





	1. Stupid Ass

**Author's Note:**

> A Question of Judgement is the second work in the "Beyond the Archon" collection, this portfolio of works will explore character pairings, events and idea threads of my post critical path MEA universe.
> 
> Throughout the game I often felt that Liam was a weak link and his consistent lack of foresight regarding the decisions he was making really irritated me, particularly stuff he was doing behind the Pathfinder's back. It got me thinking about his motivations and how far you could push them. This is written mainly from the perspective of Ryder rather than Liam, I didn't feel like I knew his character well enough to be able to tell the story effectively from his point of view.

Ryder drew her sidearm, a swift fluid motion, well-practised, instinctive, not usually accompanied by the feeling of her stomach plummeting, the nagging realisation that ‘somethings not right’ dawning on her. Instead of pulling the trigger she released the magazine and watched, as it slid free from the pistol housing in slow motion. The sound of the runners echoing as gravity pulled it free, falling, tipping clockwise, once, twice, not quite making the third rotation before hitting the metal floor of the prefab shelter. It bounced, the noise of metal on metal ringing in Sara’s ears as it came to its final resting place, empty, her magazine had been empty. She had just enough time to look up into the eyes of her would be target before a searing pain and darkness engulfed her.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------  
Vetra lay in her bunk on the Tempest, she couldn’t remember the last time she had simply luxuriated in bed. She also couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so restless, doing nothing really wasn’t a trait Turians were famed for. She checked her Omni tool for messages, again, she’d been doing it every 2 minutes since she’d woken an hour ago. The quick glance at her inbox was now a reflex and she nearly overlooked the new mail. 

“Shit!” she exclaimed doing a double take of the message. “DRACK!” she yelled “where are you?”  
“Nakmor Drack is visiting Kesh in her apartment Vetra, shall I contact him for you?” asked SAM.  
“No, no don’t worry SAM I’ll go and find him.” Vetra replied, she was hastily pulling on whatever clothing lay to hand, she grabbed a quick dextro pack on her way out, sucking out the contents as she ran towards the Tempest’s air lock.

Running through the docking bay Vetra ducked and weaved trying to avoid taking any passers-by out as she barrelled towards the apartment. “Shit, shit, shit, which one is it?” she muttered, cursing at how generic all the apartments looked, why didn’t they have names or numbers of something sensible? She took a punt and was about to knock when the door opened and Drack stood in front of her.

“Hey kid, what’s up you look like you’ve slept with a thrasher maw?” chuckled Drack.  
“We have a problem” Vetra gasped, man she needed to do more cardio.  
“What kind of problem?” Drack asked, lowering his voice.  
“Boy wonder is in trouble, we need to go and sort this before anyone…. higher up, finds out.” Vetra urgently whispered.  
“OK, OK, start walkin’, where we off too?” Drack asked as Vetra pulled him towards the tram.  
“The brig.” Vetra replied flatly.  
“You have got to be kidding me? What has he done? Does Ryder know?” Drack growled.  
“I don’t know, I just got a message from Kandros telling me that he had one of our own in a cell, he’s keeping it under wraps but we need to deal with it ASAP before someone like Addison goes poking about. Thankfully he only sent it to me, hopefully we can sort this out without bothering Ryder, can you imagine what she’d do to him?”  
“Heh, yeah, well, depending on why he’s in there I might be first in line.”

Vetra and Drack stepped out into the operations hall of the Nexus, it was buzzing with the comings and goings, as science and military personnel mingled, discussing current assignments and busying themselves with the task of settling Heleus.

Heading towards the APEX deployment centre Vetra caught sight of Kandros, the head of Nexus security, he nodded briefly, excusing himself from his engagement and heading in their direction.

“You two come take a walk with me.” He said, steering them away from the crowds. “Just down here.” The three of them made their way down a side corridor, coming to stop outside what looked like a small storage cupboard. Kandros turned to face them.

“He was picked up by one of my officers in the early hours of this morning blind drunk and raving about not following the rules anymore. He was bundled into the drunk tank to dry out, I realised who we had so shoved him in here out of sight, I know this is the last thing the Pathfinder needs.” Kandros sighed “You can take him via the service tram at the end of the corridor back to the docking bay, that should help you avoid most of the crowds. Do me a favour though, take him to Kadara if he wants to drink his sorrows away.”

Kandros stepped back and unlocked the door. Liam was slumped in the corner, he looked horrendous, he smelt worse.  
“Fuck kid, did you piss yourself?” Drack snorted in disgust.  
“Thanks Kandros, we owe you” said Vetra, “come on old man let’s get him out of here.”   
“You mean I have to touch that thing?” Drack shook himself before stepping forward and pulling Liam to his feet, who groaned as the floor shifted beneath his feet.  
Vetra joined Drack on Liam’s other side, pulling his arm over her shoulder, they dragged his limp form down the corridor in the direction of the service tram. Pulling him in Drack slammed his fist into the console, steadying himself as the tram lurched into action.

“Why do you squishes always have to go and push yourselves too far?” Drack muttered.

As the tram came to a standstill the pair braced themselves to drag the lifeless weight of Kosta through the docking bay back to the Tempest. Grateful for the thinning crowds they moved as quickly as they could, Vetra quietly fuming. Having people see the Pathfinder team drag the sorry ass of one of their own through the Nexus was not the type of publicity they needed, Tann would go crazy if he got wind of this, what was Liam thinking? Sure, they’d all gone out to Vortex last night and they’d all had fun but at least Peebee and Suvi had had the decency to pass out in the Tempest’s kitchen not the Nexus common areas.

“Where shall we put him?” Drack asked as they waited to access the Tempest “Med bay?”  
“No, can you imagine if Lexi found, this, in her office? We can dump him on his sofa with a bucket. Just check on him every twenty minutes, the stupid ass might choke on his own tongue” reasoned Vetra.  
“We’d be lucky” grumbled Drack.

Drack unceremoniously dumped Liam on the grotty couch he’d acquired, it was already stained a little drool and piss wasn’t going to make any difference when you couldn’t even tell what colour it had been originally. Vetra strategically placed a bucket and left water and a towel on an upturned cargo crate that served as a table.   
“I guess we just leave him to it” Vetra muttered “SAM can you monitor his vitals, let me know if, you know, I need to give a shit?”  
“Of course.” Came SAM’s reply.


	2. A Gesture of Trust

“Sara?” SAM said, stimulating her brain into consciousness. Ryder dragged her mind from the oppressive darkness, opening her eyes and quickly shutting them again. This isn’t real she thought, this is just some kind of horrendous nightmare. 

She forced her eyes open and took in the scene before her, she was in a small room, shackled by her wrists and ankles to the wall, she was tipped ever so slightly forward so her entire weight bore down on her wrists, she could feel the metal edges pressing into her. On the opposite wall was Cora, her head hung limply to one site the start of a black eye forming and blood poured from her nose, a steady dripping the only sound other than the shallow ragged breathing of her lieutenant.

“SAM?” Sara asked via the private channel “where am I, what’s going on?”  
“Sara, your location has not changed, you were knocked unconscious and restrained, I brought you back to consciousness, however, your brain is still processing, it is still ‘rebooting.’” SAM replied  
“Have you scrambled the Tempest to our location?” Sara responded.  
“Yes, their ETA is 17 minutes.”   
Ryder groaned “Where’s Liam?”  
“Unknown.” Was SAM’s response.

Un-fucking-known of course it was Ryder thought, anger flared in her chest, how could she have been so stupid, how many times has she handled a pistol? Hundreds? Thousands of times? Her and Scott would have competitions to see who could strip down and reload a jammed Carnifex. So why when Kosta had handed her a sidearm had she not listened to the alarm bell that rang when the gun was too light? Because she trusted him she reasoned, he was part of the Pathfinder team, why would she even consider he’d put them in danger? Ryder shook her head, the only question that mattered, and even that could wait, was why?  
\----------------------------------------------------------------  
Liam, Peebee and Sara careered into the Med bay still in their armour, they were in good spirits having just cleared out a scavenger base on Kadara that had been giving the outpost some grief. Liam had a burn to his shoulder where he’d only just moved out of the way in time, the flare from the incendiary ammo singeing his armour to the skin below, it wasn’t serious but it needed looking at.

“Not again!” exclaimed Lexi “can you not go one day without ending up in here Liam?”  
“Ah, don’t complain you’d be bored if it wasn’t for me” he replied.  
“Yes, because patching you up is all I want to spend my time doing” the Doctor was exasperated with him, he was literally in the Med bay every other day with some ailment. She couldn’t understand it, it was like he was deliberately getting injured.

“Well we’ve done our duty” chirped Peebee “time for a shower, come scrub my back Pathfinder?”  
“I thought you’d never ask B’Sayle.” Ryder quipped, she flashed a sideways smile at Lexi.  
“Make sure you use moisturising wash, Peebee has terribly dry skin.” Lexi called after them.  
“Awwww Doc! You give away all my secrets” said Peebee whining dramatically.

Lexi smiled to herself as she watched them leave, playfully shoulder barging each other down the corridor, it was good to see them both relaxed.

“Why do you encourage that?” Liam asked. 

Lexi sighed, she’d been hearing mutterings from other crew members that Liam was commenting on hers and Ryder’s relationship, mainly about how Ryder was neglecting the mission or wasn’t focused, he’d never said anything directly to her though.

“I encourage it because I know it is entirely superficial” Lexi was loathed to explain her relationship to anyone least of all Liam. She applied a burns kit to his shoulder before continuing, “flirting is just how Peebee is, it’s her mechanism for developing friendships, it’s how you know she trusts you. Ryder plays up to it just like she takes time to talk with Vetra about Sid or does biotic training with Cora, she’s simply adjusting her approach depending on her audience. It doesn’t make me jealous Liam.” She finished treating his wound, “I suggest you focus on not getting shot rather than who Ryder flirts with or judging me for putting up with it, you’re done.” Lexi was dismissing him.  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Drinking alone in Kadara port that evening Liam reflected on his conversation with Lexi, he was frustrated that his rapport with the Pathfinder wasn’t as easy as he witnessed with the others. He was trying his best to make a difference but all his efforts ended up blowing up in his face. He’d lost count of the number of times he’d tried to do the right thing and ended up with Sara saving his ass. 

“Kosta?” an asari in civilian clothing came to stand next to him.  
“Who’s asking?” Liam replied, taking a measured sip of his drink.  
“A friend of the Benefactor, rumour has it you’re after information.”   
The asari had his attention now, he’d been spending months trying to shake out information about the mysterious ‘Benefactor’ he knew that Ryder was following leads about the death of Jien Gasson, the Initiatives founder and discovering who the Benefactor was, was key.

“I’m listening.” He said.  
“Bring the Pathfinder to this location, keep it casual” the asari tapped her Omni tool, a nav point on Eos sprang up on Liam’s device.  
“You really think ‘hey Pathfinder, just come with me to this out of the way location, unarmed because some chick in a bar said so’ is gonna fly?” Liam replied.  
“The Benefactor foresaw this, as a gesture of trust 100,000 credits have been transferred to your account, consider it a bond. As for being unarmed, what she doesn’t know can’t hurt her, I’m sure you’ll figure something out.” The asari finished her drink, turned and left.  
Liam waited then returned to the Tempest, the rest of the crew had turned in for the night, he slipped into engineering, keeping to the shadows, logging on to his personal account his eyes widened as he looked at the display.

He hadn’t expected it to be so easy, en-route to Eos, escorting an angaran scientist to Prodromos he’d asked to speak to Sara privately.

“Hey Ryder” they were in the meetings room, the rest of the team had just been dismissed from the morning briefing, “a contact ‘reformed scavenger’ has asked for amnesty at Prodromos, we’ve been given a nav point to pick up all the gear he’s handing over, can we swing by and pick it up?” he asked.  
“Sure thing, sounds easy enough, we can head over in the Nomad, send me the nav point, the Nexus has security covered for our dignitaries arrival, we’re just the transport.” Ryder smiled, “thanks for letting me know about this Liam, it’s good you’ve managed to arrange amnesty, I’m glad you see the good in people.”  
“We all make mistakes sometimes” he shrugged “just glad he’s made the right choice now.”  
Liam slipped out to the crew quarters, locking himself in the bathroom stall before sending a message to the asari contact. A reply came through almost instantaneously confirming the meeting.


	3. Stabbed in the Back

Once the Tempest touched down on Eos and the Nexus staff took over Ryder prepped the Nomad, once ready she called to Cora “hey suit up we’re going for a drive with Liam.” Cora nodded and disappeared, returning moments later with her armour on.  
“Kosta, you ready?” Ryder asked over the comms.  
“Sure am, just let me grab some side arms, better safe than sorry, right?” That was Liam through and through Ryder thought, always dependable.

Liam was surprised at how steady his hands were, he picked up each of his colleagues chosen side arms and removed the magazines, replacing them with dummies. The credits in his account settled it in his mind, they were serious so he should be too, the information about the Benefactor was worth him bending the rules.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Hello Pathfinder”

Kaetus walked through the door to her right, flanked by two thugs, both armed to the teeth. “It was so kind of Mr Kosta to deliver you to me, willing and unarmed.” Kaetus paused, relishing the look of betrayal on the Pathfinders face. “Oh, don’t look so alarmed, he had no idea what he was doing, the stupid, the angry and the needy are so easy to manipulate.”

Kaetus removed a short knife from his belt, the blade casting orange flashes as it was moved through the air, reflecting the rays of the setting sun through the high slats in the wall to Ryders left. Ryder didn’t look anywhere but at the tip of that curved blade as Kaetus stepped towards Cora and ran it purposely down both her arms, cutting easily through her protective suit, exposing the skin beneath. 

“The last time we met, I promised you I’d kill you if I ever got out” Kaetus lay the knife down on an upturned crate “then I had time to think, and this will be far more satisfying.” Ryder was trying to focus but her mind was filled with static, she shook her head in an attempt to get some clarity. “Have you ever had to stand by and watch someone you care about go through immeasurable pain? Get stabbed in the back maybe?” 

Ryder thought back to those drawn-out days where minutes felt like hours as she sat by her mother’s bedside watching a viscous illness deconstruct her piece by piece. Ryder looked Kaetus in the eye.

“I’ve seen more pain than you could ever imagine. Sloane deserved to die, so what that she was shot in the back, she was crazy, she led hundreds of people to their deaths, people who just got caught in the crossfire, people she was meant to keep safe.” Ryder spat.

Kaetus snatched up the knife, stepped towards Ryder and slammed the blade into her side. Ryder threw her head back in a silent scream the piercing white hot pain voiding her lungs of air. As Kaetus removed the blade, tilting his wrist to avoid a clean exist, he relished the beads of sweat that had formed on the Pathfinders face and matched the steely look she gave him. Drawing back, he threw a punch to Ryders right hand side, he felt the satisfying crack of her ribs on impact, the second blow ensuring she wouldn’t have an easy recovery. He turned back towards Cora.

Ryder struggled to breath, she could only gasp, it felt like her insides were on fire, she could feel her broken ribs grate with each laboured inhalation. The warmth of her blood spread across her abdomen, she could feel the flow pulse with every heartbeat.

“I know your AI friend will have summoned the Tempest, I know they’ll be here soon to save the precious Pathfinder.”  
“Whatever game you’re playing Kaetus, just get it over with” Ryder gasped.  
The Turian laughed “oh this isn’t a game Pathfinder, I intend to make you suffer, I intend to make you doubt every decision you ever made, like trusting Kosta, or thinking you could protect your team.”

Kaetus was holding a syringe to Cora’s left arm “this” he said, “is an exceptional instrument of torture.” Ryder wished she could wipe the smirk off his face. He continued “the compound, when injected, results in intense localised burning, not life threatening but overwhelmingly painful.”

Sara watched helplessly as he inserted the needle into Cora’s left bicep, the effect was instantaneous. Cora’s head snapped back, howling like a banshee, Ryder looked on horrified as violent red boils bubbled like lava under her skin, the blistering become increasingly livid with each passing moment, the smell of burnt flesh filling the air.  
Ryder’s head swam, she could feel the nausea take hold, vomiting as she hung, useless watching as Kaetus continued to inject Cora, her second in command withering, pulling at the restraints as her body bucked in agony. 

“SAM!” Ryder screamed in her own head “Give my biotics everything.”  
“Sara, this is unwise your neural pathways are already at capacity, there is significant risk of death or permanent damage.” Cautioned SAM.  
“JUST FUCKING DO IT!” She screamed.

Sara felt every cell of her body ignite, as if they all suddenly stood up and turned in the same direction, she took one final look at Cora’s limp body, the lieutenant passing out with the onslaught of pain. Taking as deep a breath as she could Sara focused all her anger on the Turian in front of her, she threw her body forward unleashing a massive shockwave of biotic power. She felt her wrists and ankles buckle the metal restraints and watched as Kaetus and his foot soldiers were thrown backwards, one of the men’s helmets exploded as his head smashed into the wall. Unleashing a nova explosion, the primed targets erupted as the biotic charge ignited, the force blowing out the side of the wall.

Ryder gritted her teeth against the pain as she picked Cora’s lifeless body up off the floor where she’d fallen as her restraints failed under the force of the Pathfinders biotics. Sara stumbled blindly into the evening light through the blast hole, sinking into the soft sand, she screamed as she tried to brace, her crumbling ribs like shrapnel in her side.

Wind and sand whipped at her face, blinding her, she turned to see the familiar shape of the Tempest dropping from the sky, the tail ramp already lowered, Vetra and Drack laying covering fire. Ryder didn’t dare look back, she clung to Cora as she used her biotics to quickly cover the distance to safety. As she staggered up the loading ramp she glanced over her shoulder, in time to see Liam sprinting towards the ship, Ryder shook her head trying to displace the raging ball of hatred which threatened to rip her apart. 

“Kallo, get us to the Nexus, ASAP” she yelled, striding through the cargo hold “Gil, any tweaks you’ve been working on, now is the time.”


	4. Take me Home

Ryder didn’t look at Peebee as she pushed through to the Med bay. Lexi was waiting, Jaal too, the Med bay was prepped, emergency response equipment littered the surfaces, organised chaos. Ryder lay Cora gently on the waiting bed, before stepping back, she kept her head low, not wanting to make eye contact with either the Doctor of Jaal. 

They quickly moved in, working fast to stabilise Cora, Lexi taking control, Jaal a competent set of hands, SAM supporting in the back and forth commotion of emergency response.  
Ryder ripped off the armour from her arms and chest, she tried to steady her breathing when she saw the extent of the blood loss, Jaal looked up, about to say something, Sara quickly shook her head and grabbed a medigel pack, breaking it open over her wound as she left for the cargo bay.

Vetra, Drack and Peebee stood in silence looking at Liam. No more than 2 minutes had passed since they’d lifted off from the surface of Eos, dust and the smell of gunfire hanging in the air.  
“What the hell happened?” Roared Drack.

“Good question Drack” Ryder growled, through gritted teeth as she marched towards Liam, her eyes filled with fire, not leaving his. “Although not as good as why the fuck he walked us into a trap and deliberately sabotaged our weapons? If I’m honest those questions are slightly higher up my list of priorities than why he jogged back onto the Tempest whilst I carried an unconscious second in command who I’d just watched being tortured.” She’d almost screamed the last part, she didn’t care what the others thought, she didn’t care that she was losing control, she wanted answers.

Liam looked at her, he opened his mouth but nothing came out. Drack had drawn himself up to his full height, Sara could feel the rage resonating off him, he moved inches from Liam face “your commanding officer just asked you a question, don’t you think she deserves an answer?” he spat.

Liam backed away “I didn’t know OK. They said they had information about the Benefactor but would only meet if they knew you were unarmed. I checked all the sources it seemed legit.” He faltered, he hadn’t checked the sources, he’d just looked at the credits.

“How could you be so stupid” Ryder yelled, “how did handing me and Cora side arms with empty magazines possibly seem like a good idea?”  
“I was fed up of following the rules” Liam countered, his voice rising and becoming more hysterical “I thought it was worth the risk, that you wanted information on the Benefactor and we could get it but I had to break a few rules. Everyone else does. I’m fed up of always being the guy who does the right thing but it still blows up in my face. Everyone else is breaking the rules to get what they want, the Archon, outlaws, scavengers, even you Pathfinder.” 

Sara had been pacing the cargo bay trying to absorb what Liam was saying, the pain of her ribs, blood loss and horrendous ringing that had started to fill her ears causing the world to spin. She stopped. Ryder stared in disbelief, breaking the rules, what? He couldn’t seriously mean. “Lexi?” she said, “you put our lives in danger because of me and Lexi?”

“It’s not fair, it’s not right, you knew the line and you crossed it, like your happiness was above everything else.” Liam was glaring at Ryder.

Whatever thread had been holding Ryder together snapped.  
“What the fuck do you know about fair Liam? Let’s think this through, you think the Ark and Nexus being torn apart by the scourge was fair? You think my brother ending up in a coma was fair? How about my father dying, becoming the Pathfinder and being responsible for preventing the extinction of four species, that was fair too?” Ryder was losing it, she couldn’t work out where she started or stopped, she had continued to pace, now she turned back towards Liam and felt herself unleash a biotic throw which pinned him against the back wall of the cargo bay “what the fuck do you want Kosta” she yelled.

“You” Liam replied weakly “I want you Sara.”  
She watched him drop to the floor, his legs buckling underneath him. She turned to leave “Drack, lock him in his room, Nexus security will be waiting on arrival.”

Sara faltered as she walked down the corridor to her quarters, she was beyond pain, her mind was fraying, I just need to lie down, she thought, falling backwards onto her bed, for the second time that day the Pathfinder fell into darkness.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Doctor T’Perro, we have a situation” SAM interrupted Lexi’s thoughts as she continued to work on Cora. The lieutenant’s burns were eating her cells from the inside out and Lexi was desperately trying to stabilise the areas to slow the damage.

“I know SAM!” Lexi responded briskly, not looking up from her work.

“No, this relates to the Pathfinder Dr. T’Perro” Lexi froze, “in order to escape Sara asked me to boost her biotic ability, this coupled with substantial blood loss, abdominal trauma and severe emotional stress means her neural pathways are overloaded, in short her brain is in meltdown.”

Lexi couldn’t believe what she was hearing, her brain computing a million different iterations, blood loss, abdominal trauma, why hadn’t Sara said anything? She couldn’t leave Cora the lieutenant was nowhere near stable, but she couldn’t lose Ryder either.

“Peebee!” Lexi shouted  
“Already here Doc, what can I do to help?” Lexi had never seen Peebee so serious, a look of steely determination on her face.  
“Peebee, you need to go and help Sara.” Peebee could see the agony in the Doctors eyes “her brain is in overload and if you don’t get her to a calm space we’ll have a vegetable for a Pathfinder.”  
Peebee hadn’t expected that, she swallowed, “I… what? How?”  
“Sara will keep you safe, don’t worry about her screwing about in your head, she’ll take you somewhere quiet just keep her there OK?”  
Peebee gave a small nod of understanding.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Peebee found Ryder lying deathly still on her bed, a small pool of blood spilled onto the crisp white sheets. The only movement the shallow breathing of the Pathfinder and the flickering of her eyes under her eyelids.

The asari lay next to Ryder, taking her hand in hers, come on she thought, she needs you to do this, just relax. Peebee let out a long steady exhale and let her mind reach out looking for Ryder’s.

Peebee stepped onto the deck of the Leusinia, she could see Ryder sat on a step looking out through the hull breach towards the Kett command ship. Missiles from the ship looped towards Sara, their flared tails vibrant against the black abyss of space beyond. Peebee ran forward thrown a biotic barrier around the two of them.  
“Ryder, we need to get out of here”  
Darkness

“Lexi?” Ryder called in the dark  
Peebee took her hand “Wrong blue, she’s tied up with Cora.”  
“Peebee, I can’t control…” Ryder trailed off as they found themselves flying through Ryders memories, flickers, moments.

A young girl using biotics to balance a pile of rocks, a boy, a flash of hate, as he topples the tower and calls her a freak. Excitement, the first Prothean dig site, a sense of wonderment and discovery. Fear, Alec hanging helpless in his climbing harness, the chalk on his hands vibrant against the rock face. Pain and hurt, holding her mother’s hand as she tried to say goodbye.

Peebee could feel the tension and stress rising, she could feel the walls of Ryders mind closing in around them both, suffocating, oppressive.  
“Sara, take me to Lexi, take me to the place you go together, find her.”  
Peebee felt herself being ripped through what felt like layers of anger and suffering. More flashes of memories.  
Lexi, in profile against the stars of the Tempest meeting room, her face illuminated by her data pad. Realisation, the kiss on Ryders neck in the cargo bay. Tenderness, peace, waking up nuzzled in the warmth of each other. Lust and longing, a stolen moment in the Med bay.

Ryder, still holding Peebee’s hand turned her away and led her round an unseen corner. They walked out onto a small grassy ledge, bathed in the soft glow of a sunset. The mountains which stretched far into the distance looked like sea monsters in the mist. The air was calm, warm and still, it smelt sweet, like on a summers day after rain.  
“Where are we?” Peebee breathed “it’s beautiful.”  
“Aya” replied Ryder “Thank you for bringing me here Peebee.”  
“Oh you did this all by yourself” she smiled “this place is magical Sara.” At first Peebee couldn’t place what she was feeling, wrapped up in Sara’s mind, she looked over to see a tear slide down the Pathfinders “why didn’t you tell her?” Peebee asked.  
“I couldn’t find the words” Sara replied, turning to Peebee “take me home?”


	5. Pretty Obvious

Peebee drew herself back to the Tempest, holding Sara’s hand all the way, the Pathfinder looked at her weakly “I think it’s time I went to the Med bay, help me up?”

The asari jumped up and helped Ryder get gingerly to her feet, she was unstable, a cold sweat plastered her hair to her skin and the colour had drained from even her eyes. Peebee managed to steer the Pathfinder through the Tempest and hoist her onto the nearest bed. Ryder groaned as her broken ribs crumbled in her abdomen.  
Lexi turned to look at Ryder, her partner, usually so full of life lay listless, prone, the sheen of sweat adding to her ghost like appearance. 

“Jaal, keep monitoring Cora, the sedative should be taking effect.” The Doctor quickly scanned Sara, her blood pressure was dangerously low, the Pathfinder was heading into shock from the blood loss. “Peebee, start cutting her suit off I need to get fluids in” Lexi grabbed a blood pack and saline solution, preparing the IV line she desperately searched for a vain that hadn’t collapsed. Finally, the needle penetrated, Dr T’Perro let out a sigh of relief as the line flushed through and the bags of fluid started to drain.

Peebee had grabbed the reinforced shears from the medkit and started cutting the tough armoured neoprene off Ryder’s torso, the material was stiff with dried blood. Working her way up to the Pathfinders neck she quickly worked down each of Sara’s arms, the material thinner here to aid movement, cut away easily. Pulling back the material Peebee made short work of the Pathfinder’s baselayer and let out a gasp as her abdomen came into view. 

Sara’s right hand side was developing into a spectacular bruise of lurid yellows and deep reds, her ribcage deformed. Peebee fired up her Omni tool to complete a scan.  
“Four broken ribs, one of them looks like a pretty complex jigsaw.”   
“For now, all we can do is plaster some medigel on, she’ll need surgery to remove the splinters, but at least they’re held inside her” Lexi replied.  
Whilst Peebee was dealing with Ryder’s ribs Dr T’Perro was trying to understand why a relatively superficial knife wound had caused so much blood loss. Clearly the attacker had tried to cause as much damage as possible in one hit but the blade had barely penetrated beyond the muscle structure, Ryder’s blood wasn’t clotting, she knew the Pathfinder’s medical history inside out and had treated her for far worse injuries before with no platelet booster.

She racked her brain “Ryder, Sara, can you hear me?” Lexi asked. The Pathfinder groaned. “Your attacker, was it a Turian?” a brief, barely noticeable nod.   
“SAM, what’s our ETA on the Nexus?” Lexi questioned.  
“We should arrive in 14 hours Dr T’Perro” responded SAM  
“OK” Lexi took a few deep breaths, giving herself time to think, “can you patch me through to Gil please SAM?”  
“Comms are ready Dr T’Perro.”  
“Gil? Have you got any of that” she thought for a moment “duct tape?”   
“Sure, I do, it’s great for holding the ship together” Gil replied.  
“Will you bring some to the Med bay ASAP?”  
“Will do” came Gil’s reply.  
Peebee’s eyes widened, “err, Doctor, why are we taping Sara together?”

“I’d be interested to know too” said Gil as he jogged through the door a roll of thick silver tape in his hand.  
“The blade used make this cut is treated to prevent the victim’s blood from clotting, as a result even a small, seemingly superficial cut…” Lexi faltered.  
“Could cause the victim to bleed out” finished Peebee “sneaky bastard! Can it be reversed?”  
“Yes, there is a specific serum but I don’t have the equipment or supplies to synthesise it here, so until we get to the Nexus all we can do is try and seal the hole.” Lexi had been cleaning the surrounding area of the stab wound as she spoke. Even as she watched a slow stream of blood would well up at the edges before overflowing. She tore a strip of tape and sealed it over the wound, pulling the edges together, it wasn’t idea but it’d do the job.

For the next hour Lexi, Peebee and Jaal continued their work to stabilise and monitor Ryder and Cora. With the spread of Cora’s burns halted the sedation was enabling her to sleep away the trip to the Nexus without the excruciating pain. Lexi had seen this compound used on Omega, it had a half-life of 72 hours which meant Cora was in for an unpleasant few days, once the pain had subsided steps could then be taken to reduce the scarring. 

Peebee was in the process of removing the armour from Ryder’s legs, taking off her boots and had arranged a med kit and pillow to elevate Sara’s legs, helping to improve her blood pressure. Lexi changed over the blood packs, pleased with the progress Ryder was making, her blood pressure was steadily climbing as the fluid volume in her body increased and she was starting to gain a little more colour.

“OK” Lexi announced “I think we’re pretty much there, both casualties are stable, just a case of monitoring and getting to the Nexus as quickly as we can. Jaal, take a break, grab some food, I’ll need your help to take shifts through the night.” Jaal nodded before leaving the Medbay. “Peebee, would you mind taking Ryder’s things to her quarters?” Lexi continued “I’m going to have a tidy up in here, get something to eat too, you’ve had a rough time.”   
Peebee gathered up the armour that was scattered over the Medbay, she knew Lexi needed a moment alone so left without a word.  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------  
Lexi’s shoulders sagged as she fell into her chair letting her thoughts gather, she couldn’t quite believe what had transpired in the last few hours. She knew Sara, Cora and Liam had headed out to pick up some supplies, they were supposed to be away for thirty minutes’ tops. The rest of the Tempest’s crew had been relaxing near the landing zone enjoying the sun.

When SAM had raised the alarm, they had all dashed to stations ready to scramble the Tempest, Gil and Kallo had worked hard to get her up as quickly as possible but they all felt frustrated by the lag in getting the engines warmed up. Vetra and Drack had rushed to the armoury to pull on their gear and pick up weapons, nobody knew what they were expecting to find so they decided to take up position on the lowering tailgate and recon the area as they came into land.

Lexi had grabbed Jaal to help her ready the Med bay, with no idea about the injuries they’d raced to have all the emergency response equipment on standby ready for whatever faced them. As they waited in the Med bay their only source of information came from Suvi and Peebee who were processing the reports from SAM and monitoring the area trying to come up with a plan. Lexi couldn’t suppress a smile when the report came in that a biotic blast had blown the side out of the building; she knew it was Ryder. Sara’s biotic ability was startling, Lexi believed it was due to the exposure to Eezo she’d experienced through her mother’s work, the only problem being evolution. 

Whereas the Asari had evolved over thousands of years to hone their natural biotic ability and could manage them with extreme control. Humans were evolutionarily young, their minds not yet matured enough to fully cope with this new ability. It meant humans struggled to control their biotics during emotional stress, either positive or negative.  
Sara understood the power that she wielded which meant she’d had to become an incredibly controlled and aware individual. Lexi remembered how when the Tempest’s crew first got together a number of the team had commented that Ryder seemed distant, Dr T’Perro had realised very quickly that the opposite was true. Sara Ryder felt deeply, she cared deeply but she also had to keep it all controlled and partitioned.

Lexi ran some warm water into a bowl and took a soft cloth, whilst Jaal had done a good job at cleaning up Cora, Sara still looked a state with what looked suspiciously like vomit drying on her chin. Lexi moved the strands of hair that had stuck to Sara’s face and gently wiped away the dirt and grim from her partner. Ryder’s eyes fluttered open.  
“Hey stranger” Lexi whispered, a small smile crept across Sara’s lips as she focused on the Doctor “no talking, just rest OK” Lexi bent down and softly kissed Sara’s forehead, lingering a moment, when she withdrew Sara’s eyes had closed, her breathing shallow but steady.

The Doctor continued to carefully clean up Ryder, she couldn’t suppress the flash of anger when she studied the crumpled and bruised flesh which was Sara’s rib cage. Lexi had to grit her teeth and focus on the feeling of Sara’s skin on hers as she cleaned the violent red sores on the Pathfinder’s wrists, she’d been shackled and beaten. Tears welled in her eyes as she took Ryder’s hand in hers, finding solace in the familiar entwining of palms on palms. When Sara gently squeezed back Lexi sighed, she was still here, she was safe now, that was all that mattered.

Vetra wordlessly walked into the Med bay, she lay a hand on Dr T’Perro’s shoulder “You OK?” she asked.   
Lexi looked at the Turian and smiled “not in the slightest, but they’re both stable and with time they’ll heal” she gently lay Sara’s hand back on the bed, taking the proffered mug of steaming tea Vetra was holding “thank you.” Lexi hesitated, not sure if she was ready for the answer to her next question “Vetra, what happened? Where’s Liam?”

“You might want to sit down” Vetra stated, she then continued to explain how Liam had been manipulated into walking them into a trap, how he’d received a large sum of credits as a gesture of trust and taken it on face value, she explained how it has taken SAM roughly five seconds to trace the money back to Kaetus and if Liam had only thought to do the same all of this could have been avoided. Vetra wasn’t sure if she should disclose how Liam had deliberately sabotaged his teammates weapons but with a small shrug she stated it matter of factly, Ryder would tell her anyway.

“Why though?” Lexi asked, “I get that he thought he was doing the right thing but these decisions are pretty blind even for Liam.”  
“He has feelings for Sara” Vetra replied bluntly, “we’re pretty sure he was trying to impress her, getting information on the Benefactor, he’s such a stupid, deluded fool.”

Lexi sat in silence, letting the news sink in, the last few months finally making sense, the whispering about Ryder not being focused on the mission, his drawing attention to her flirting with Peebee, getting injured all the time he’d been trying to put a wedge between the two of them. Sara wouldn’t have seen it.

“Vetra” Lexi paused, “I always thought it was pretty obvious Ryder was into women.”  
Vetra couldn’t help but let out a little laugh “Oh yeah, even if she didn’t flirt with anyone, she was definitely looking!” Vetra mused “I guess you only see what you want to see.”

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The hours to their arrival at the Nexus ticked by, leaving Jaal to monitor Cora and Sara, Lexi walked through the Tempest to the mess, she wasn’t hungry but knew she needed to eat something. 

Peebee sat at the table pushing her food around her plate, not really committed to eating it. Lexi bowled out some soup that was on the hob and sat next to her fellow asari.  
“How are they doing?” Peebee asked.  
“They’re both stable, I’ve been in touch with the medical team on the Nexus, they’ll have everything in order on our arrival. Cora will be under sedation for a couple of days and Ryder will be going in for surgery immediately to remove the bone splinters. She’ll be on bed rest for a couple of weeks whilst the fragments fuse but then should be back to normal except for pain relief and no heavy lifting.” Lexi paused, forcing some of the hot soup down “have you seen Drack?”

“He’s in the cargo bay outside Liam’s door telling him all the ways he’s going to kill him” Peebee replied cheerfully before scowling “why did he have to go and be such an ass?”  
Lexi laughed “quite the understatement there Peebee.”  
“I know, it’s just…” Peebee trailed off.  
“What is it?” Lexi asked kindly.  
“I, I just feel bad, like I was part of the problem, I know Liam had been commenting about me and Ryder. I knew that either one of you would say something if it wasn’t cool, I never thought it would upset someone else.” The words had come tumbling out of Peebee, she looked dejectedly at her food.  
“Peebee, you’ve done nothing wrong. I love seeing you and Ryder relaxed, it’s how your friendship is, Liam just has no idea how to adult.” Lexi sighed she could feel herself getting worked up.

Peebee shifted uncomfortably “I also feel a bit weird, I’ve never melded with anyone before.”

Lexi stared at her “Peebee, I’m so sorry” she genuinely was “I didn’t know, I would have never asked you if I’d known” she dropped her spoon into her bowl and put her head in her hands, how could she have been so stupid.

“No don’t worry, in a way, I’m glad my first time was with Ryder, someone I care about, it kinda gave me hope actually.” Lexi turned to Peebee “she really loves you, like all of her really loves you, I’ve never known that feeling, knowing it exists gives me hope I might find that someday” she smiled “plus, you look pretty good naked Dr T’Perro” Peebee winked.

“Peebee!” Lexi exclaimed, the blush rising in her cheeks.


	6. Maybe Not Enough

Their arrival at the Nexus was chaotic but also oddly calm, everyone knew their role. Cora and Ryder were handed over to the medical team who worked swiftly, Ryder’s surgery was long and arduous but the Salarian surgeon was pleased with the results and with the bruising and inflammation reducing day by, in time Sara would make a full recovery, the wound in her side had quickly healed once the serum had been applied, a scar would be all that remained.

Cora had been kept under sedation, cell rejuvenation techniques were being used to help heal the damaged tissues, whilst scaring was unavoidable it could have been much worse. Kandros had escorted Liam to a cell, the Nexus leadership had received reports from the Tempest’s crew and SAM, a decision would be made on his fate when the Pathfinder was released by the medical team.

The extent of the damage to her rib cage meant Sara was kept in hospital for 16 days following surgery, she tried her best not to let on but lying on your back for over two weeks was, testing. She looked forward to Lexi’s daily visits but under the watchful eye of Nexus staff they kept their interactions strictly professional.

“OK Pathfinder, you are free to go” smiled the nurse “Tann would like to see you before you head back to the Tempest and you’ll need to have your boarding medical completed by Dr T’Perro.”  
“Thanks for looking after me” Ryder meant it, her care had been excellent and she knew her speedy recovery was due to their diligence.   
The pain in her side was now a dull ache unless she sneezed, but day by day it was getting better and she was glad to be able to use her full lung capacity again with only a little discomfort.  
\--------------------------------------------------------------------  
“Ah, Pathfinder” Tann acknowledged her as she walked into his office “good to see you on your feet again.”  
“Thank you Director Tann” Ryder replied politely.  
“I’ll get straight to the point, having a member of the Pathfinder team in prison isn’t an ideal situation, we have kept this from general circulation but we now need to make a decision regarding Mr Kosta’s future.” Tann, although formal, was attempting to be as understanding as he could but Ryder knew this whole sorry affair looked bad on her and the Initiative.  
“I haven’t yet spoken to the crew of the Tempest” Ryder stated, “I want to make sure everyone’s voice is heard, but, fundamentally I cannot have him on my ship.”  
“Understood Pathfinder, please, speak with your crew and we will decide on the best course of action.”   
\------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Ryder gathered her team in a meetings room on the Nexus, she didn’t want to have this conversation in their home. It was odd seeing everyone in such a formal setting.  
“Looking good kid” Drack said as he walked in.  
“Yes, it’s so good to see you, upright” added Jaal.

Sara cleared her throat as they all settled down, she had never expected to have this conversation.  
“You all know why we’re here, I wanted to speak, as a team about what happened, everyone gets a say and there will be no judgement of your opinions.” Ryder took a breath before continuing “Liam made a totally misguided judgement call which put the team in danger, whilst circumstances may be excusable….” Drack snorted in disgust at this “…. Liam deliberately sabotaged our weapons.” Ryder faltered, from the reaction of some of her crew this hadn’t been common knowledge, Suvi looked incredulous.  
Sara continued “my personal feelings on this are simple, I don’t have room on the Tempest for mistrust, I put my life in each of your hands every day, willingly, because I trust you all, there is no space for me to be second guessing or double checking.”

Suvi looked around at the others before letting out a small cough. “I think” she said cautiously “I speak for everyone when I say we would rather Liam not return to the Tempest.”  
Ryder met each of her team’s gaze in turn, searching for any flickering of doubt, they all returned her with a look of total solidarity and confidence.

“Agreed” Sara replied simply “I’m going to recommend Liam is reassigned to an outpost and stripped of Pathfinder team status and any leadership responsibility. It would undo so much of our hard work to have him imprisoned permanently and the Initiative cannot afford any ill effects from his poor decisions.” Ryder held up a hand, Cora and Drack had both started to speak “I know many of you, myself included, will feel this is an unjust punishment given the damaged he has done; however, we have to lay aside our first response, we are all hurting from this, and look at the bigger picture.” This seemed to placate her team, they needed to process what had happened, the wound that Liam had caused would be difficult to heal.

“Finally,” Sara looked at a point on the far wall, not wanting to meet the eye of her crew “do any of you harbour feelings of resentment of disapproval regarding mine and Dr T’Perro’s ongoing relationship?”  
“You’re joking” scoffed Gil, “that prick did all of this because he couldn’t handle you and Lexi?” Gil stared in disbelief.  
Drack broke the silence “yeah, it looks that way kid.”  
“No Ryder” Gil had found his voice “nobody here gives a shit about who makes you happy.”

“Good” Sara smiled “we leave the Nexus in 3 hours, our resupply is just finishing, the Nexus team are loading the cargo bay we can distribute everything once we’re flying. I’ll see everyone back on the ship, Cora, could you hold on a minute.” Sara hadn’t had a chance to really catch up with her Lieutenant.  
As her crew filed out Ryder felt the weight of the whole situation lift off of her, it was done, they could put it behind them.

“Cora, I” Ryder wasn’t sure she could find the right words “I’m sorry, I ignored the alarm bell that rang when Liam handed me my pistol and I should have tackled the rumours I’d been hearing about his attitude, I dropped the ball and I’m sorry I couldn’t keep you safe.”  
Cora stared at her “Sara, are you serious? You’re taking responsibility for the actions of a total jackass? I don’t blame you, I’m angry at him, I’m angry at the fucker who injected me with a chemical weapon, I’m angry at myself for not questioning the alarm bell that went off in my head about the pistol.” Cora stopped to catch her breath “and don’t you dare think I have any issue with you and Lexi, you’re cute together” she smiled, “come on the Tempest is waiting for its Pathfinder.”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Ryder stood on the bridge, happy to be home, watching the Tempest rise from the Nexus, Kallo had the helm and was humming happily to himself, back to doing what he loves.  
Happy everything was under control Sara headed to the cargo bay where the rest of the team were busy sifting through the huge stack of crates and containers from their resupply, even Suvi was down from her station helping. Food, equipment, spares, munitions, medical supplies, everything they needed for another three months of exploration. 

Ryder let the buzz wash over her, the hive of activity infectious, she headed towards an unopened crate.  
“Don’t even think about it” warned Vetra “everyone knows you’re to do no heavy lifting.”  
“OK Mom” Ryder sighed, she turned and headed to the Med bay she knew Lexi needed to file a report to the Nexus medical staff, got to dot all the ‘i’s’ and cross the t’s. 

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Lexi was busying herself sorting through supplies, she knew Ryder would come by soon, it felt like an eternity since they’d had a moment together, after the initial worry had subsided Lexi found herself unsure of what to do with herself. She’d spent hours reading research papers about things which barely interested her to take her mind off Sara. The nights were the worst, trying to fall asleep and then waking up without the familiar warmth next to her, she’d felt such an ache of loneliness. When she did fall asleep her dreams meant little rest, at first, they’d been nightmares about Sara tied up, Lexi unable to quite get to her, then, as the weeks had passed they’d become, rather more lustful. The Doctor had woken numerous times trying to cling onto the feeling of Ryder and her, the warmth between her legs adding to her frustrations.

And there she was, Sara Ryder walked into the Med bay looking as calm and relaxed as ever, the smile she flashed Dr T’Perro instantly causing the Doctor to curse her for looking so sexy yet so casual.

“Scan and bloods?” Ryder asked.  
“Plus a few extras” warned Lexi.

Silence settled between them as Lexi worked, Sara knew the routine so well she didn’t have to think about the automatic movements she made to let Lexi complete her work. Neither woman wanted to break the silence, they hadn’t been alone for nearly three weeks, the last physical contact had seen the Doctor trying to put her lover back together.  
Lexi lay down the datapad on her desk and turned to Ryder “Done” she said simply, walking to stand between Sara’s open legs as she sat in her usual position on the edge of the bed. Lexi rested a hand on each of Sara’s thighs feeling the strength beneath, she tilted her head down, not ready for the intensity of meeting Sara’s eye “I’ve missed you so much Sara.”

Sara let her cheek gently brush Lexi’s, in a barely audible whisper, only for the Doctor’s ears, “I love you.”  
Then they were kissing, hands pulling bodies close, tongues entwined, lips nibbled, fingernails gently biting into shoulders, breath shortening. 

“We should…” Sara began.  
“Ssh!” Lexi gasped.

Ryder slid off the bed, Lexi pulled at Sara’s shirt, breaking their kiss long enough to pull the material over her head. Sara’s hands found the zip of the Doctor’s jacket, pulling it down, Lexi shrugged out of it, her other clothes falling away. The warmth of skin on skin, the soft moans of lust as hands roamed to sensitive spots.  
Sara used her biotics to lighten the load as she lifted Lexi onto the end of the bed, Lexi wrapped her legs around Sara’s hips, pulling her close. Ryder kissed the nape of Lexi’s neck, a familiar spot she knew drove her love wild, with one hand on Lexi’s back her other drifted between the Doctors legs.

Lexi moaned as she felt two of Sara’s fingers slide into her, curling forward to hit the spot only she knew how to find, both women lost in each other, barely registering the brief appearance of Suvi, who entered, turned sharply and immediately left, still clutching the case in her hand.

Sara loved the feeling of Lexi’s body as it moved and flexed against her, the Doctor lost in a world of pleasure. Ryder could feel Lexi tightening around her fingers, she moved her thumb to massage the Doctors clit.

Lexi couldn’t supress the moan of ecstasy at Sara’s touch, she wrapped her hands round Ryder, pulling her close, digging her nails into Sara’s shoulder as her climax washed over her.

They continued to kiss softly but deeply as Lexi came down from her high, Sara revelling in just holding her close, re-establishing their connection.  
“Now we should go to your cabin” Lexi purred.  
“You might want to put some clothes” Sara smiled “Suvi already saw more than she probably wanted to.”  
“Or maybe not enough” Lexi wrapped herself in her jacket, she gently pushed Ryder against the wall as she pulled on her shirt, kissing her “come on Pathfinder, I’m not done with you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note to say "thank you" for taking the time to read my work, kudos is motivating but only when deserved.
> 
> The next work in this series will focus on another romantic character pairing, before shifting to deal with Liam's replacement on the Tempest.


End file.
